You don’t have to give up your peep-toes be a guy’s girl.
My first serious boyfriend lived in a house with four other guys, where pizza night was every night, Miller Light was considered the nectar of gods and the closest thing to window treatments were posters of Anna Kournikova. After two years of being the only girlfriend who stuck around, while my boyfriend’s four roommates’ brought by virtually every Ashley, Chelsea and Lindsey within county lines, I couldn’t take it anymore. I finally asked my boyfriend to tell me what these poor girls were doing wrong or if his friends were just womanizing douchebags. He laughed and he said, “Mostly my friends are just jerks, but then again the girls who walk in and out of here don’t really make an effort to fit in, they sit here in their mini-skirts and high heels and laugh nervously and smile the whole time, you can tell they’re not comfortable.” Ever since then I haven’t been able to shake this whole concept of being a guy’s girl.
Let’s face it, guys have unreasonable expectations. At the club they want us in mini-skirts and heels, practically oozing sex, and at home, they want us in jeans and a tee, chugging Keystones with their guys and on top it, somehow managing to keep our figure, so we can fit in those mini-skirts come next weekend. But if we’re being honest, girls are just as guilty when it comes to wanting the best of both worlds. We want that bad boy who never actually treats us like dirt, the one who’ll irritate our father just enough and still look impeccable on paper.
With that said, you don’t have to change yourself to give your guy the best of both worlds. I’ll never be into action flicks or dunking chicken wings in caramel sauce but here are some things I’ve learned from a high school and college career of dating guys who are involved in serious bromances.
So you’re not into sports or the calorie-fests that revolve around them? Coming from someone who wholeheartedly believes the NBA playoffs can single-handedly ruin a girl’s sex life, I don’t blame you. So “the big game” is on (though you’re not actually sure what sport it’s for) and you want nothing to do with it but still want to show your man some love? Drop by his place during half-time with a case of his favorite brew and a pizza in tow. Keep it short—say hello, tell his friends to enjoy the rest of the game and whisper in your guy’s ear to call you when they leave. It shows that you’re so cool with his bro sessions that you’ll even encourage them to keep the party going and it gets you off the hook of watching the game with him. In my experience, this trick has an extremely high success rate, not just with scoring points with your guy, but also with his friends.
The next tip is elementary but goes a long way—keep the outfits easy going. I’m not telling you to change who you are. If you love harem pants and sky-high pumps, by all means, wear what makes you happy but keep in mind how your guy feels when you dress that way. One of my ex’s said it best, “When a girl shows up to a BBQ in a dress and heels, it makes me wonder if she has somewhere else to be afterward.” We’re thinking we just want to look our best, but the average guy is thinking, “high maintenance.” Whether you like the answer or not, it’s generally true. The average guy doesn’t understand that fashion is a statement, so make your style stand out in details, like a great necklace or trendy nail color. Coming from a girl who just left an internship working at a major fashion magazine, its imperative know your audience—Jeffrey Campbell boots and Bud Light don’t work together. Also, even if being around a crowd of guys makes you uncomfortable, you can at least dress for comfort. My go-to outfit? Jeans and a tee are a classic for a reason.
Next, don’t play it Stepford with a plastered smile on your face, laughing nervously at everything one of your guy’s friends’ say. You don’t need to stroke anyone’s ego. And since there’s bound to be a little locker room talk, don’t be afraid to get right in there, joke around and shoot it right back. Obviously you don’t need to go on a rampage and take it upon yourself to personally offend every guy in the room but if you’ve got something to say, say it. The only thing worse than stumbling over your words is not saying anything at all. With that said, don’t be afraid to leave your man’s side. Even if swinging the guy talk on your own isn’t the best experience, not only will you score points with your man and his friends for trying, you’ll have gained at least some insight to the male mind, if even only for a minute or two. Trust me, it’s worth it.
Above all, remember to keep it comfortable. Men respond well to comfort. Why do you think most of them talk to their mom at least three times a day? Be yourself, just play your strengths to what you know will be guy-friendly. And if all else fails, next Friday night, rock your new peep-toe pumps and your favorite fashion-forward frock and cheers to being who you are, whether the guys can take it or not, because there’s nothing more guy-friendly than a girl who isn’t afraid to be herself.
 |
| single girl society |
My first serious boyfriend lived in a house with four other guys, where pizza night was every night, Miller Light was considered the nectar of gods and the closest thing to window treatments were posters of Anna Kournikova. After two years of being the only girlfriend who stuck around, while my boyfriend’s four roommates’ brought by virtually every Ashley, Chelsea and Lindsey within county lines, I couldn’t take it anymore. I finally asked my boyfriend to tell me what these poor girls were doing wrong or if his friends were just womanizing douchebags. He laughed and he said, “Mostly my friends are just jerks, but then again the girls who walk in and out of here don’t really make an effort to fit in, they sit here in their mini-skirts and high heels and laugh nervously and smile the whole time, you can tell they’re not comfortable.” Ever since then I haven’t been able to shake this whole concept of being a guy’s girl.
Let’s face it, guys have unreasonable expectations. At the club they want us in mini-skirts and heels, practically oozing sex, and at home, they want us in jeans and a tee, chugging Keystones with their guys and on top it, somehow managing to keep our figure, so we can fit in those mini-skirts come next weekend. But if we’re being honest, girls are just as guilty when it comes to wanting the best of both worlds. We want that bad boy who never actually treats us like dirt, the one who’ll irritate our father just enough and still look impeccable on paper.
With that said, you don’t have to change yourself to give your guy the best of both worlds. I’ll never be into action flicks or dunking chicken wings in caramel sauce but here are some things I’ve learned from a high school and college career of dating guys who are involved in serious bromances.
So you’re not into sports or the calorie-fests that revolve around them? Coming from someone who wholeheartedly believes the NBA playoffs can single-handedly ruin a girl’s sex life, I don’t blame you. So “the big game” is on (though you’re not actually sure what sport it’s for) and you want nothing to do with it but still want to show your man some love? Drop by his place during half-time with a case of his favorite brew and a pizza in tow. Keep it short—say hello, tell his friends to enjoy the rest of the game and whisper in your guy’s ear to call you when they leave. It shows that you’re so cool with his bro sessions that you’ll even encourage them to keep the party going and it gets you off the hook of watching the game with him. In my experience, this trick has an extremely high success rate, not just with scoring points with your guy, but also with his friends.
The next tip is elementary but goes a long way—keep the outfits easy going. I’m not telling you to change who you are. If you love harem pants and sky-high pumps, by all means, wear what makes you happy but keep in mind how your guy feels when you dress that way. One of my ex’s said it best, “When a girl shows up to a BBQ in a dress and heels, it makes me wonder if she has somewhere else to be afterward.” We’re thinking we just want to look our best, but the average guy is thinking, “high maintenance.” Whether you like the answer or not, it’s generally true. The average guy doesn’t understand that fashion is a statement, so make your style stand out in details, like a great necklace or trendy nail color. Coming from a girl who just left an internship working at a major fashion magazine, its imperative know your audience—Jeffrey Campbell boots and Bud Light don’t work together. Also, even if being around a crowd of guys makes you uncomfortable, you can at least dress for comfort. My go-to outfit? Jeans and a tee are a classic for a reason.
Next, don’t play it Stepford with a plastered smile on your face, laughing nervously at everything one of your guy’s friends’ say. You don’t need to stroke anyone’s ego. And since there’s bound to be a little locker room talk, don’t be afraid to get right in there, joke around and shoot it right back. Obviously you don’t need to go on a rampage and take it upon yourself to personally offend every guy in the room but if you’ve got something to say, say it. The only thing worse than stumbling over your words is not saying anything at all. With that said, don’t be afraid to leave your man’s side. Even if swinging the guy talk on your own isn’t the best experience, not only will you score points with your man and his friends for trying, you’ll have gained at least some insight to the male mind, if even only for a minute or two. Trust me, it’s worth it.
Above all, remember to keep it comfortable. Men respond well to comfort. Why do you think most of them talk to their mom at least three times a day? Be yourself, just play your strengths to what you know will be guy-friendly. And if all else fails, next Friday night, rock your new peep-toe pumps and your favorite fashion-forward frock and cheers to being who you are, whether the guys can take it or not, because there’s nothing more guy-friendly than a girl who isn’t afraid to be herself.
Post a Comment